I mumbled my grievances as I stumbled into the car yesterday. Hauling clarinet, music book, Sunday School lesson book, answer book, water bottle, bulky purse and a raincoat, I fell into the passenger seat completely disgruntled. I hate being so busy and could only wish the day would be over soon.
“If you looked the word ‘busy’ up in the dictionary, you’d have to turn the pages fast to catch a glimpse of me.”
The driver, my husband, looked at me and drove to church in merciful silence.
I closed my eyes to pray on the short trip, hoping to find some peace, any scrap of worship ability, before I started playing my instrument. The day was way too packed with activity.
But they were good activities, what was my problem?
The driver, my husband, had talked with me about all the “shoulds” and “have tos” in my life. “Where are the ‘get tos?”” he asked.
Where’s the joy? “Can you help me see them, Lord? Why don’t I feel any joy?”
And there in the quiet car, I saw it. Rather than taking the opportunity to recognize the joys in my life, I had been choosing to focus on the self-pity of too much to do. Sort of like a child complaining they had a stomach ache because they’d had such wonderful food.
“Forgive me for choosing self-pity, Lord. Help me to see and be the person you created me to be, today.”
The driver, my husband, carried my water bottle into church and filled it for me. He agreed to ease my burden with one of those blessings, and it was a much better day.
Thanks be to God. 🙂
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